It's been a while hasn't it. . .? Since I've been long gone, I've started my job at Walmart. It's good to get out and do something but my body isn't so used to the running around all the time. I almost passed out yesterday but I think I was just exhausted and my body wasn't used to running around all day. . .
Things have been very. . foggy for me lately I guess. I keep having these internal battles that seem just. . .be about nothing. I've been having panic attacks lately as well which. . I've never really found myself having until recently. I don't really understand why but I guess there's nothing to do about it at the moment except try to prevent them. I've just been having a lot of issues lately with feeling like I'm a part of something and people wanting me to be a part of something with them. I just feel like this world wasn't meant for me. I feel so out of touch with everything but the more I try to connect, the more I just...get disappointed and upset with people don't connect back. I have such high expectations for my own interactions that when they don't go well, I start shutting down or blowing up.
Sigh. . . This whole journey has just been terrible and I wish I could crawl back into the hole that I came out of but that wouldn't do me any good.